Oh...and GEM....

...Your comment to make up for, uhmmmm, something very important I may have blogged about yesterday, still hasn't come through. Or were you going to comment on my half-snipped brother? Either way, it hasn't come through...

Which leads me to think you either 1) Hate me for calling you a bitch, 2) You were re-reading "The Office" - because REALLY what else do we have to do with our lives - when you emailed me about posting a comment and accidentally sent a message to the author chick about my half-snipped brother, or 3) My blog is broken...

Either way I still love you! Please try again so I know if I am the really "special" one in this relationship!

Oh, and should I let Lil' Bro know about this? I mean, I told him about it but do I risk sending him the link?

:)lrb

What...did you think I would post something without a picture? Although there are a few fuckhawt new pics of RP out there that may or may not be in my Obsessions folder of the laptop, I really wanted to show off the enjoyment my new phone gives me. It has photo-editing stuff on it!...

HA! (Let me know if you want me to work my MAD Paint skills and hide your face! Although you are my only follower and the non-edited pic is on your profile...but I wanted to give you the option!)

ME LOVE YOU LONG TIME, GEM!!!

See what I got today...

To help me make it to whenever GEM brings me "our" copy of Sexy Stars of New Moon, I bought this today...

*Yes, that is my literature anthology UNDERNEATH my newly acquired copy of time-wasting material! You can see it in the top right corner...sort of!*

I also ran around Hot Topic and Spencer's with my nine-year old taking random pictures to torture GEM with...while "explaining" my behavior to my son with things like, "I am soooo going to make fun of GEM with these pictures!" This is perfectly normal conversation to distract anyone from thinking the pictures were for me or that I actually have read *gasp* or even lusted *double-gasp* over anything Twilight related!

I couldn't resist a picture of "not-hot-cuz-of-the-bad-wig" Jacob!

Here you go GEM!!! He's all yours, in four months :)

:)lrb

GEM and I might be fighting...or we might just be retarded!

So, to aid in all our things Twilight, New Moon, and obsessions-we-really-are-too-old-to-have, GEM lovingly acquired a copy of the new "Sexy Stars of New Moon". You know, THIS one!

Here is how it all went down...

Last weekend, GEM was at the airport and called me to ask about this beautiful magazine. Actually she called me to talk her down from her baby-withdrawals...and she hadn't even gotten through security yet!! After I assured her that the Bean wouldn't forget her because she went away for a much-deserved, two-day trip to see an old college friend, we moved on to our "Sexy Stars of New Moon" conversation. Did she really want to spend ten bucks on it? Did I really need it, because she would spend the ten bucks for me? (luv u GEM!) Were there any Teen Wolf (aka...Jail Bait!) pictures in it? Whatever...she got the damn magazine. And then flew to fucking Dallas with it for the weekend!

Loyal and thankful friend that I am, I didn't forget about GEM while she was off traipsing around with "our" magazine. While at the mall on Saturday, I came across...NOT acrost, because that IS NOT A WORD!!...anyway, I came across something that reminded me of my dear friend.

And the texting began...

lrb to GEM:
There is a shirtless Jacob shirt @ Hot Topic.
I'll send you a pic!
lrb to GEM:

GEM to lrb:
Oh sweet jesus! That oughta b illegal...oh wait
it is. So bummed my cell doesn't have a zoom!

Ha! Ha! GEM is so funny, and I don't have to threaten her when we drool, because she bats for the other "Team"! Mock her, frequently, but no threats for GEM.

Moving forward to Thursday - GEM is home from Dallas, and we finally can get ourselves together for a play date (we include the kids, so we can call it that!) Fun at the park and train station, yummy tuna salad for lunch, the Bean drops a BIG load in his britches, which is Master G and my sign to head on home!

But wait, I thought this post was about Sexy Stars? I am confused...why are you talking about parks and dirty diapers?

I, too, was confused...

lrb text to GEM:
WTF?? No showy me magazine of drool...sad lrb
:(
GEM to lrb:
The pgs r stuck 2gether-must get new
one...KIDDING!!!
lrb to GEM:
I might have to blog about this...if I can stay
awake...everytime I sit still for more than 5 min...I start to fall
asleep...sucks 4 reading! *(btw-GEM and I are FF whore wanna-be's and I am
taking 2 literature classes which are cutting deeply into my ff addiction and
sleeping schedule-in that order of importance!)*
GEM to lrb:
U must sleep-try an hr nap then rd. I thot of mag
like 5 times-just never got the wds out. If u blog it has 2 b how we r both
tards! Not just me. *(We both ARE retards, all the time, really!)*
lrb to GEM:
Of course...TARDS UNITE! *(Gotta stroke her ego -
GEM still has "our" magazine so I can't be pissy about her "thinking about it
like 5 times!" Did she really think of it 5 times, or was it, like 5 times? And
WHY could she "never get the wds out"? Damn it all to hell!!)*
GEM to lrb:
Also i was in car & i thot if she is txting
that office posted rt now I will die!! *(FF is rotting our
brains!)*
lrb to GEM:
Sorry...no update :( But my ? was equally
important...& equally sad in its denial!

So, now GEM has had the damn magazine for a full WEEK. I spent nearly four hours with her yesterday, and I still don't have a magazine to drool over while my husband isn't watching!! God only knows what she is doing to any pages that RP and 'not-legal-till-feb' share!!

That bitch!!

Addendum to post, even though I haven't hit "publish" yet - I just got an email from GEM. Seems Master G left his sweatshirt at her house yesterday. So, she is going to bring the sweatshirt AND the magazine over...next week! Damn it all to hell!!

I guess I shouldn't complain...I could have forked out the ten bucks myself. But then I wouldn't be able to bitch about it to...GEM, who is the only one that I have told about this damn blog!!

TARDS UNITE!!

LOVE YOU GEM!!!

So, my bro is funny, too....

I took my son and TWO of his friends from school bowling today. One on one, Master G's friends are okay - spastic at times, but they are nine-year old boys. Put three of them together, and WW3 is likely to start! But that isn't the point of this post (it might be for my "real blog")...what does this have to do with my funny brother...

Lucky for me, my brother decided to have mercy...uhm...join me in my plan for bowling fun. [Did I thank you yet, Master G's Uncle?] At one point, I went to high-five my brother, probably after he demonstrated an incredibly difficult gutter ball...hee, hee...and I noticed he had a mark smack dab in the middle of his palm.

Here is the convo that followed...

Me: "So, when did you go all 'Jesus Christ Pose' on us?" * (gratuitous Chris Cornell reference...oooooh, Chris Cornell!)

Lil' bro: "Yeah, I am only half-circumcised...ehhh?"

Me: "HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! I'm gonna send that in a text to GEM! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!"

Good thing the bowling alley wasn't too busy and no one was paying any attention to us, especially the three nine-year old's we were watching!

*No offense intended. Oh, and Lil' bro meant to say "crucified", not "circumcised", which is the only reason this was funny!

Oh, and since I mentioned the wondrous Chris Cornell, man with a golden voice, here is some sexy...

First post...no funny title...I'm a sucky blogger!

So, for my first post, I wanted to share a piece of my boring life.

Some girlfriends and I are venturing out of our lurkdom...obsession...whatever...to attend the New Moon premiere...well, not THE premiere, but we are going on opening night...well, not THE opening night...damn it, we are going on that Friday, okay. You know, THE Friday! November 20th!

So, I had taken it upon myself to be the pre-purchaser of our tickets. And the following email went out last night...(the names of the "innocent" have been changed for their protection!)...

email to: Green-Eyed Momster (GEM), Stresser-mom (SM), Still-a-Newlywed (SaN)
subject: Info for November girls date!!! (Only mild swearing and a few threats!)
~~~~~~~~

All righty ladies...

GEM reminded me yesterday that I didn't let you know that I DID in fact get our tickets!!!
Yes, I have them printed and stored in my lovely GQ magazine. You know the one with this cover...

The one GEM so lovingly bought at the airport for me on her way somewhere...and she didn't even smudge it up before she gave it to me! <3u,>!!

DAMN IT! He cleans up well!! Is he fuckhawt or what!!! GEM, you are NOT allowed to say anything but nice things about MY man, and SM, I WILL TAKE YOU DOWN if I need to, so step off!!! SaN, see the fun you are missing by being employed! Or still a newlywed!

Moving on...

Where are you all going to be November 20th @ 7:30? Yeah, that's right bb's, at the movies with me!! Once it gets closer we can figure out when we want to get there, where we want to eat, if we need to bring a flask...! Please remember ladies, we are going to be surrounded by a bunch of teeny-boppers and I WILL wait till AFTER I see the movie to bail anyone's ass out of jail. So, let's all be nice and friendly. Hopefully I won't be eating my words after I take out some loud, obnoxious thirteen year old wearing a Teen Wolf shirt (That was for you, GEM!)

Now, ask me the most basic question...I don't think I got the line quite right, and you ladies are normally lam-o with catching them anyways...back to the "most basic question"...What do we eat...uhmmm, I mean...What do we wear!!!

Pick a shirt ladies, and I will order it! I, unfortunately, really like the black maternity shirt at Cafepress best, but I will probably get something else. Who knows. I am also going to get some pins because I think they are cool and I am a dork...They will be my tiny present to you all for putting up with the teeny-boppers!

http://www.cafepress.com/Twitarded
http://www.zazzle.com/twitarded

Oh and SaN, since you probably don't know who these gals are...go to...http://twitarded.blogspot.com/ They are hilarious! Just be prepared, because blog lurking is serious business and a BIG time waster!!

Oh and just in case you need to SEE them...

and

Cuz I'm a dork like that!

Talk to y'all later!!!

Pudgy, no hair-washing, flannel wearing, crooked smile toting, dork-a-licious, beautiful bastard british boy lovin' lrb :)

PS - SM...I.WILL.TAKE.YOU.DOWN...STEP.OFF!!! :)

So, after sending this, I was cleaning out my sent folder, reading some of the random crap that I email to my friends - especially when it comes to Twilight, fan fiction, or GEM - and I came to a realization....I'm a funny gal. This realization made me think of Henry Rollins, but that post will have to wait for another day! Now, not everyone will find me funny. But, they can "SUCK IT!"...Triple H Style!! (Please nobody get that reference!)

Now, I need to hit the "Publish Post" button and feel the joy of...well...publishing! I will really feel the joy once GEM comments. She is the only one that is going to read this drivel anyway...

:)lostrosebrown


P.S. - Sorry, I don't know where I got that beautiful picture so I can't credit them and I don't know if I am a bad blogger by including the Twitarded links. This is my first blog post and I don't know all the crediting rules...I am just adding this to show my ignorance, ask for forgiveness, and cover my ass!